/ Wednesday, 29 November 2017 @17:22 /
For those who don't know, I recently turned 20 and it's pretty scary. I feel like I should be a new person but it just comes with more responsibilities. A responsibility to look after myself and push myself to be a better person. It sounds pretty lame but if we can't do that for ourselves than what's the point? New year, new Ash
It's okay to be satisfied by superficial things
I think this is one of the biggest things I learnt while working. If I had a dollar for the amount of times I've been asked "why do you work so much", I wouldn't need to work. I like earning because I can spend it on whatever the fuck I like. I don't have a car or a house or anything big in mind. I just want to buy a fuck ton of books and makeup, is that so bad? I think this way of thinking applies to most things. If the only reason you go to the gym is so that people will compliment you on ig, then you do you. Not everything has to have a deep ass meaning. As long as you're happy, then that's all that matters. People will judge you regardless, so do whatever you want.
Don't let guilt consume you
I'm guilty of agreeing to things because I feel bad. Or just not doing what I want because I'll feel guilty about it later on. Whether it's saying yes to something or not doing something because of the chance that someone else might not like it. At times, it's definitely this perceived worry that actually isn't real. Like if I actually wanted to do what I want, there would be no real repercussions. I'm just stressed about future guilt that I would feel. So moral of the story, don't worry too much. Something I actually haven't learnt tbh LMAO A realisation more than anything.
There is still room to grow in self-love
There's this idea that if you love yourself, you can't change yourself. I think a big part of accepting who you are, is accepting that you have flaws and that you can change. If anything, loving yourself means being open to change. Realising that you aren't the same person you were a year ago, a month ago, even a different person from yesterday. I'm allowed to love myself and still think I'm a dumb cunt. Accept myself and still realise that I look goofy af. Self love and self care means knowing that you are good, but you can be better.
Always make time for people you love and care about
This is something that I really appreciate when it's done for me and I try to make the effort to do the same. If you can't take 5 minutes out of your day, to ask someone how they're doing that you need to reevaluate yourself. Life is hard and it gets busy but if you're using that as an excuse you are the worst kind of friend. I'm at a point in my life where if I didn't want someone in my life, I could easily break them off. With that in mind, I think it's important to realise who is important to you and why they're important. In that same vein, think about what can you do to make sure that the relationship is 10/10
Skincare is everything
This might just apply to me, but learning to take care of my skin has been really therapeutic. There is nothing that calms me down more, than taking a moment to take care of myself. I guess it is a form of self care that I find really satisfying and enjoyable. My skincare journey is really funny to me, because I never really wore makeup because I was scared that it would make my skin worse. I then started wearing makeup more regularly and this led to me spending more time taking care of my skin. As a result my skin improved drastically and I stopped wearing crazy amounts of base makeup. It was this weird cycle and here I am. A crazy skincare hoarder. Honestly, it is very expensive, but I honestly think that taking care of your skin is crucial and a sign of good health. Get on it, guys and gals!!!!
Take a moment to be creative
I feel as if being creative is honestly so helpful in self growth. When I say creative, I don't necessarily mean creating something from scratch. Something that I personally enjoy, that a feel like is kinda creative, is adding to my pinterest boards. It feels like I'm creating a particular aesthetic for my life. Maybe it's not exactly creativity, but it's finding a different way to do something that you normally do. For me, it's changing up my makeup, or re organising my book situation. Doing something small and different, shakes up life with minimal effort. It keeps things fresh and breaks up the mundanity of life.
Sometimes I wonder if I even have a right to talk about relationships with my very obvious single status LOL I go through this cycle of wanting to be in a relationship and being really proud of my independence. At the end of the day, I think everything requires a certain amount of effort. I think if I tried a lot harder and put myself out there, I could find someone. At the same time, I just feel not ready for a relationship. Like I'm too immature or too insecure to let someone in my life. I have too much emotional baggage and that's not me trying to make an excuse. I guess this is me trying to say that I need to constantly work on myself and my flaws. It wouldn't be fair to the other person, if they had to be with someone who couldn't look after themselves. And also to put more effort into getting to know people. If I'm interested I should just go for it. I have this fear that people won't like me and it's just something that I need to get over. Important life lessons yo
ADV // 20